Dude! Where's My Broom!
by The Hogwart's High Inquisitors
Summary: I'm not good at writing summaries. So just take my word on it. It is a great story!
1. Chapter 1

**I do not own any of these characters, but I wish I did!**

"Dude! Where's my Broom?"

"James I have no clue where your broom is, so stop asking me!" Sirius says with annoyance in his voice.

"Are you completely sure you haven't seen it?" James retorts back with frustration. "Your completely sure!"

"I am completely sure. I haven't seen your broom since you last played on it in your last Quidditch match!" Sirius says, starting to get irritated with this conversation.

"Are you serious?" James says giving up. A smile crosses Sirius' face.

"I'm always Sirius!" Sirius' smile widening.

"Ha Ha very funny." James says with a forced smile on his face. "It's not like I haven't heard that one before."

"Well, have you asked Remy? He might've seen it." Sirius starts to walk a little faster.

"I already asked Remus. He told me to go ask you." James replies.

"Ok, just pretend I never said anything." Sirius mumbles walking up to the portrait of the fat lady.

"Password." The fat lady asks the two boys.

"Owl Droppings" James replies and the portrait opens to reveal a hole in the wall leading them into the Gryffindor common room.

The common room is packed with students, but it doesn't take them long to find their friends. Remus is sitting at the back of the common room reading one of his textbooks. There beside him is Peter playing with his wand like a three year old would play with his rattle. James and Sirius quickly walk to the back table and take a seat.

"So… Remy what are you reading?" Sirius knew what Remus was reading but he couldn't resist making Remus say it.

"Oh…Ehhhh… The Dark Arts by Kingleys Webbing. Why?" Remus says a little distracted because he is reading.

"Oh… It just looked interesting." Sirius says keeping his gaze away from Remus.

Remus looks up from his book and stares at the top of Sirius' head. It was very abnormal for Sirius to say he was interested in any book for the fact that HE DOESN'T READ! It takes a little while longer for James to realize what was said. And when he finally does he shoots a look at Sirius.

"Sirius did… did you just say a BOOK looked interesting?!?!" James looks from Remus back to Sirius. "This is definitely a sign of the apocalypse."

"Shut up Jamie!" Sirius gives James a dirty look.

"Don't call me Jamie! And if this isn't the sign of the apocalypse then it is a sign that you need to go to the Hospital Wing." James says with a worried smile.

"This isn't a sign of anything! I can say a book looks interesting if I want! It isn't like I am going to read it or anything! Drop it!" Sirius gets up from his sit and walks up to his dorm blushing all the while.

Remus and James watch as Sirius leaves the table and jettisons up the stairs. For about a minute, they just sit there and pondering there own reasons for Sirius' outburst. It was one thing for Sirius to yell at them about a book, it was another thing entirely for him to be blushing. Not once in all of the 4 years spent at Hogwarts together had they ever seen Sirius blush or even be embarrassed.

Remus just shrugs it off and blames the lack of sleep for his performance. Sirius lately has been studying late into the night for his O.W.L.'s that is soon to be coming after this term. He realizes that this is a little out of the ordinary for Sirius, considering he rarely studies, but whatever.

James on the other hand gets to thinking. Lately Sirius has been acting a bit abnormal. First of all, Sirius starts paying attention in class, which is something he never did in the past. Sirius and James always copied Remus' notes right before each test so they'd pass. Second thing is Sirius goes all study crazy, which is even more on the psycho side since he's never studied a day in his life. He fully understand Remus studying every night for his O.W.L.'s but Sirius? No. Thirdly, Sirius and the whole "interested in a book" thing, which is definitely a sign that he is becoming schizophrenic or the world is coming to an end, which ever comes first.

"What's got Padfoot's wand in a knot?" Peter asks to no one in particular while still playing with his wand (the one used for casting spells; you dirty minded people).

"He's just having a hard time preparing for his O.W.L.'s." Remus answers with little interest about what's eating Sirius and more interest back onto the book he's reading.

"No. I don't think that's it." James says more to himself then to Remus, who's now sticking is face completely in his book. "There is a reason for his weird behavior and I'm going to find out what it is."

"Whatever." Remus says from the inside of his book.

"You do that." Peter says still fascinated by his wand.

Up in the boys' dormitory, Sirius is sitting on his bed smacking himself profusely. "Stupid. Stupid. Stupid. How could I have said something so stupid?" He stops smacking himself and stares out into the dormitory; he sees a boy looking at him like he was a complete lunatic.

"What the fuck you staring at you prick?!" Sirius screams at the boy, who then bolts down the stairs.

Sirius sighs and lies down on to his bed. From there he watches the curtains of his four-poster bed sway in the wind coming in from his open wind. He then closes his eyes and an image of a boy pops into his head. _The boy just sits there on the edge of the lake watching something in the distance. Maybe it's the squid or maybe it's just some kid making a complete fool of himself. Whichever it is, it didn't matter. Sirius was more interested in the boy sitting serenely by the lake then what he was looking at. The boy with his beautiful light brown hair and mesmerizing brown eyes and extremely soft skin and…_

Sirius opens his eyes and looks down at the bulge in his pants. "Shit."


	2. Chapter 2

**I do not own any of these characters. I don't even know if I own the plot! **

"Over and Over" Performed by Three Days Grace. Written by Three Days Grace / B. Stock / G. Brown.

"Over and Over I Fall for You" 

"_Over and over, over and over / I try not to / Feels like everyday / Stays the same / It's dragging me down / And I can't pull away / So here I go again / Chasing you down again / Why do I do this/ _Chorus: _Over and over, over and over / I fall for you / Over and over, over and over / I try not to / Over and over, over and over / You make me fall for you / Over and over, over and over / You don't even try to / So many thoughts I can't get out of my head / I try to live without you / Every time I do I feel dead / I know what's best for me, but I want you instead / I'll keep wasting all my time."_

It's 3 o'clock in the afternoon and Sirius is sitting in the library writing this song. He doesn't see James walk into the library and walk behind him. James starts reading over his shoulder and it doesn't take long for Sirius to realize someone is behind him.

"Jamie! What the fuck do you think you are doing? Reading over my shoulder like that?" Sirius asks meanwhile stuffing his song into his backpack. "It's down right rude!"

"Since when are you about politeness? The Sirius I know wouldn't give two gallions about being polite." James replies with a smile and amusement in his voice. James sees the anger play upon Sirius's face and says "Lighten up a bit! It's not like I was reading your personal journal or something. It was just a poem or song or whatever you choose to call it. Jeez, what's got your knickers in a twist?"

James glares at Sirius wanting for an answer that doesn't come. As James watches him he sees Sirius's face start to go from a pale white to a bright red and then to a maroon. James can't believe it! He's blushing again! Right in from of his very eyes. Before James can stop himself he says the one thing that makes his friend blush even more fiercely.

"Are you blushing?" Sirius turns from an ugly shade of maroon to a deep blood red. He couldn't believe James just asked him that! And to make matters worse he practically just yelled it across the library. And if he thought things couldn't get any worse, it did! Everybody in the library, including the boy of his dreams, was looking at him, seeing his reddened face and embarrassed expression.

Before anyone could register what was going on Sirius flew out of the library as fast as his legs could carry him. James was left standing by Sirius's empty seat staring at Remus with a look saying I-told-you-so. James, just that morning, was telling Remus that something was definitely going on with Sirius and Remus argued saying there was nothing wrong with him. That little display showed how much Remus knew; James was right, for once, and Remus was wrong. The only thing was was they had no clue what it was that was bothering him.

Later when their all in their beds, sleeping the night away, Sirius is in his bed having a very… Good dream!

_He sees that boy lying there on his bed sleeping quietly. Dreaming dreams he couldn't be able to begin to know. He sees his gorgeous brown hair covering his beautifully closed eyes. Sirius sees him looking at him, wait when did he wake up? Sirius thinks to himself. The boy is looking at him with a smile and He sees lips saying, "I love you, Sirius." Sirius starts to feel warmth spread throughout him. But wait… that feels like…_

Sirius wakes up and feels the warmth not spreading throughout him, but spreading throughout his legs, his pjs, and then his sheets. "Damn it! Not again!" Sirius whispers to himself. He throws his blanket and sheet off him and stands. He's covered in the results of his wet dream. Sirius walks to his bedside bureau and grabs his wand.

"Incontaus" Sirius murmurs to clean his sheets and bed. He then replaces his wand on his bureau and goes into his trunk and takes out a fresh pair of pjs. He quickly changes and gets into bed. After he is settled he starts to drift back to sleep. For the rest of the night Sirius is trapped in a dreamless sleep till he is awaken, very abruptly and to early if you ask Sirius, by Peter.

"Rise and Shine sleepy heads!" Peter skips across the room and down the stairs. Sirius tries to go back to sleep, but it was already too late so he decides to get up. When he sits up he sees the boy getting out of bed. He gives Sirius a smile and stands up straight and stretches. Sirius is paralyzed. He can't seem to be able to remove his eyes from this boys' body. His heart starts to pound faster and his palms start to sweat and he starts to notice that he is getting excited.

Quickly he looks away from the boy. He couldn't handle it. Sirius made a promise last night that he would forget about him. But seeing him today, in the early morning light getting ready for the day ahead, he couldn't. He was falling in love again with this boy and the boy wasn't even trying; he probably didn't even realize what he was doing. If only he could tell him everything. About the dreams, about all the songs and poems he writes about him constantly, about this lingering feeling of love and fear.

"Sirius!" Sirius looks up and sees Remus calling him. "Are you coming?"

"Yea, give me a couple minutes, ok?" Sirius yells across the room and then gets up and goes into his trunk for his uniform. After he puts it on he heads for the common room where he finds Remus sitting on his usual chair, Peter sitting on his usual patch of floor and James… not sitting in the chair in front of the fireplace. Wait a second…

"Where's Jamie?" Sirius asks looking around the common room.

Remus looks up from yet another book. "Ummm… I don't know. You didn't see him up stairs?" Sirius shakes his head. "Well…" He looks back down at his book. "Maybe he's at breakfast."

"Whatever. When you see him tell him I know where his broom is." Sirius walks to the common room entrance and walks out. He heads straight for his new hang out spot. The Library. When there he takes the seat in the back so James can't find him easily. He pulls out a bunch of rolled up parchment and rolls them open. He takes out a quill and starts writing a poem.

Except there is a problem: James is in the library looking for him. He is looking through the rows of shelves for him and then he finally spots him in the back. Sirius quickly puts his things away and waits for James' arrival at his table.

"What's up Sirius? Remus said you knew where my broom is. So where is it?" Jamie says all in kind of a rush. "The game is in two weeks and I need it for practice."

"What would make Remy think I know where your broom is?" Sirius asks while successfully hiding a smile.

"I don't know. All he said was 'Sirius knows where your broom is' and went back to reading his book." James is starting to get a little irritated and Sirius enjoying every minute of it. "So you're sure you don't know where my broom is?"

Sirius stops and thinks about it for about a minute just to annoy James and then says, "No." James throws himself into the chair in front of Sirius and slams his head onto the table. Sirius could tell just by the sound of the slam that it hurt a lot and that he was going to have a good size bump later on. A little wave of guilt starts to engulf Sirius until James opens his big mouth.

"So are you on drugs or something? You seem psycho lately." Sirius' face starts to turn a bright shade of red. "And what is with the blushing? You have never blushed before. I swear you've gone soft." And that was it for Sirius; James finally crossed the line.

"Shut your fucking mouth! It is none of your fucking business. If you had just left it alone I would have eventually told you, but now you proved to me that you are an unworthy friend! In fact you are not a friend at all!" Sirius stands, grabs his things and leaves the library with an angry Professor Linch (Yes, Linch) following behind yelling at him for yelling in the library.


	3. Chapter 3

**I don't own any of these characters!**

"**All Around Me" Performed by Flyleaf Written by L. Mosley / J. Culpepper / S. Bhattacharya / J. Hartman / P. Seals**

All Around Me 

Sirius sees the boy sitting up against a tree listening to the wind blow. He watches as the boy's hair is blown to one side of his face. As if on queue the boy turns to look at Sirius. "Hey, why don't you come and sit with me." The boy gives Sirius one of his beautiful smiles and he can't help but take up the boy's offer. Sirius starts towards him. But… Wait… The gap between Sirius and the boy grows longer and the earthy scenery turns into a dark corridor. He starts to run down the corridor that doesn't seem to end or go anywhere. Wait… come back… "Sirius" He runs faster toward the voice. "Sirius" Wait…

"Sirius!" Sirius jumps half way out of seat and looks around for the owner of the voice. He doesn't have to look to far; standing next to him is Professor McGonagall and she is mad. "Well, it seems that once again you have took it upon yourself to take a nap in my class. There is a reason why classrooms don't have beds in them. Detention and 10 points from Gryffindor; class dismissed."

Everyone scrambles in a hurry to get their things and leave. Sirius slowly pulls his things into his backpack and stands. He is almost on his way out the door when…

"Black." Sirius turns and looks at Professor McGonagall trying to find out what she's thinking through her facial expression, but he sees nothing. He walks up to her desk and waits for her to speak again. "I have noticed that your performance level in this class has risen quite reasonably. I am rather impressed." Professor McGonagall looks at Sirius with an expression of great admiration. Their eyes are locked for about a second till Sirius looks away in embarrassment. His face starts to turn a light pink.

"This is nothing to be embarrassed about." McGonagall looks over the tops of her glasses and her expression changes from a relaxed smile to a worried frown. "But I am worried about you. Though your grades are going up you seem to be going down. I haven't seen you hanging around with Potter or Lupin anymore. You three use to be inseparable and now I see you off in the library by yourself. And now you are falling asleep in class."

"I do that all the time!" Sirius says with a nervous laugh.

"Yes, but only every once in awhile, not every other day." McGonagall says and then looks away and starts collecting her papers into a pile. "Promise me you will get some sleep." McGonagall says then patiently waits for Sirius' answer.

"I promise." Sirius says and then waits for McGonagall to release him.

"You make go now." Sirius nods a thank you and leaves.

"I'm starting to get really worried about Sirius." James says to Remus while looking at Sirius from across the common room. James, Remus, and Peter are sitting in front of the fireplace and Sirius is sitting in back of the room at a table, writing. "Look at him. He's been sitting there for 4 hours straight, writing."

Remus looks over at Sirius and watches him for a couple of minutes before turning to James. "Maybe I should go talk to him. You seem to just make things worse." Remus smiles and chuckles a little at his own joke.

"Shut up." James says with a very relaxed grin on his face. He looks back over at Sirius and his smile disappears. "Yea, maybe you are right. He'll listen to you. Try talking to him after supper." All three look over at Sirius and wondered what he was up to.

Sirius looks down on the song he is writing. All day long he has been writing this one song, trying to make it perfect, trying to make it have meaning. He stares at his curvy handwriting flowing across his parchment like waves in a sea. Sirius rereads it one last time, trying to feel it flow like a curtain in the wind.

"Perfect." Sirius says to himself. He's finally finished it. He carefully places the piece of parchment down on the table as if it could crumble at the slightest touch. He looks up from his beautiful work of art into the eyes of a beautiful boy. Sirius' heart suddenly starts to beat rapidly. The boy is looking at him! Sirius could feel his face turn red with excitement and embarrassment. Sirius suddenly started to worry that the boy could see right through him. That he could see his love for him and the songs and the dreams.

Sirius couldn't handle it. He stood up out of his seat, grabbed his things and started to run out of the common room. He could feel the warmth of his tears burning his eyes as he races to get out of the gaze of his secret love. He was in such a hurry that he didn't notice that he dropped his beautiful, precious work of art.

When Remus saw Sirius running to the door with tears in his eyes he knew that now was the time to do something! He jumped out of his chair and ran to meet Sirius before he disappeared outside the common room, but a piece of parchment that Sirius dropped caught his eye. He picked it up and read it. It was a song called "All Around Me" and Sirius himself wrote it.

"My hands are searching for you / My arms are outstretched towards you / I feel you on my fingertips / My tongue dances behind my lips for you / This fire rising through my being / Burning I'm not used to seeing you / I'm alive, I'm alive / Chorus: I can feel you all around me / Thickening the air I'm breathing / Holding on to what I'm feeling / Savoring this heart that's healing."

It was pretty well written and it had a nice flow to it. But the lyrics made him wonder. Is this the reason Sirius is acting this way? Does he have a secret lover or is secretly in love with someone? And if this was true, then who? This was definitely the time to act.


	4. Chapter 4

**I do not own any of these characters!**

A Needle In A Haystack 

"How about her?" James asks pointing to a beautiful blonde across the corridor. At that moment James and Remus were searching for Sirius' secret love. After Remus found Sirius' song he brought it to James who then called on a search for Sirius "so-called" secret love or lover.

"No, no." Remus says waving his hand. "Sirius would want a girl to be intelligent, beautiful, and not a Slytherin! And she…" Points to the blonde. "Is a Slytherin."

"Well excuse me! Sorry if I'm not as observant as the Great and all Masterful Moony!" James says tauntingly while bending over in a bow.

"Shove off!" Remus says through his laughter. "You know what?" Remus stops walking and looks over at James with a somewhat serious expression. "This is stupid. We're looking for a needle in a haystack. Sirius could be in love with anyone of the hundreds of girls in this school."

"Well, then maybe you should just go talk to him about it." James says trying reason with him. "He won't get mad at you. What do you say?" James looks at Remus with pleading eyes.

"I'll think about it, ok?" Remus says walking ahead of him and passing through the Gryffindor common room.

Walking along the lake, Sirius thinks to himself about his predicament. He is completely lost on how he is to go about telling the boy his feelings for him or even if he should. Sirius was just about to turn around and head back to school when someone called after him.

"Sirius." He turns around and sees Lily running up to him. "Hi, what you doing?" Lily says trying to catch her breath.

"Nothing, just walking around." He looks at her and is somewhat relieved that it was her who stopped him and not Remus or James. "You want to walk around with me?"

"Sure." Lily steps on the side of Sirius and they start their walk around the lake together. "So, is everything ok? You've been kind of distance these past couple of months." Lily looks over at Sirius for his answer.

"Everything's fine." He says this trying not to look at her in the face; hoping that this will disguise his true feelings. It doesn't work.

"I know something is wrong. You can tell me. I won't tell anyone." Lily stops and looks up into Sirius' dark eyes. "I am your friend Sirius, please talk to me. Tell me what's wrong."

Sirius is silent for a few minutes before getting the courage to spill his guts. "I've fallen in love." Sirius says this and starts to walk and Lily follows along side him.

"Oh, and who is this lovely lady that you have fallen in love with? Do I know her?" Lily asks very excited.

"Well… You see… It's like this…She's a he." Sirius says stopping and turning a bright red. Lily stops in her tracks and looks at Sirius with eyebrows raised.

"Sirius…I didn't know you were… Why didn't you tell anyone?" Lily asks with a little smile.

"I was afraid of how people would react. I mean… do I look the kind of guy who'd likes other guys?" Sirius asks shyly.

"No, but so what. The Sirius I know doesn't care about what people think!" Lily responds with a chuckle. "You don't have to feel ashamed of your sexuality."

"You sound like a shrink." Sirius says through his laugher. Sirius starts to laugh so hard that he falls over in pain.

"You are so weird." Lily says before being overcome by fits of laughter. After their laughter subsides, Lily asks the one question that Sirius was praying she would forget to ask, "So who's the lucky boy?"

Sirius turns from a bright red to a maroon color. "Well it's…" He takes a deep breath and says the boy's name.

"Wow." Lily says raising her eyebrows. "Hmm…I can see why you'd like him. Do you have any idea if he's gay?"

"Not a clue." Sirius says a little defeated. "I'm probably wasting my time. Watch he probably has a girlfriend."

"Sirius, do you really believe that?" Lily asks sweetly.

"I don't know what I believe anymore." Sirius says completely losing hope. He looks at Lily like a lost puppy before going over to her and placing his head on her shoulder and crying.

"Shhh… It's ok." Lily says while slowly and softly patting Sirius' back like a mother does to a child. "Everything will turn out for the best. I promise you that. I promise."

In the distance, James watches Sirius and Lily holding each other. He was surprised by what he saw, but also a little angry and jealous. How could he be so blind? It all fits; the late night studying in the Gryffindor common room, the paying attention in class, the blushing. Whenever Lily was up late at night studying so was Sirius. Lily has all the same classes as Sirius, Remus, and me. So to prove to Lily he was smart he'd pay attention in class. And the blushing; he always seems to be blushing whenever I'm around. This proves that he feels some shame for stealing the girl of my dreams. I can't believe I didn't see it.

James rushes to see Remus in the Great Hall. When he gets there he tells Remus everything he saw and everything he's found out. "Everything fits, Remus! Can't you see it? It's as you said, and I quote 'Sirius would want a girl to be intelligent, beautiful, and not a Slytherin.' Lily is all those things." James finishes a bit out of breath.

"It is a little hard to believe, but I guess it does all fit." Remus says thinking hard. He opens his mouth to say something but closes when he sees Sirius and Lily walking through the Great Hall double doors. Both James and Remus watch as Sirius and Lily take seats on the far side of the Great Hall, both sitting close and talking feverishly.

"I think you should go up to him today and tell him. It'd be better to get it over and done with. So if he doesn't feel the same way, you can move on. I know this isn't something you want to hear, but it has to be said." Lily says looking intensely into Sirius eyes.

"I understand, I just… I don't know if I can handle rejection." Sirius says a little helpless. "I've never wanted something so badly."

"Well, then you can't just stand on the sidelines. You need to get in the game and fight for what you want!" Lily says feeling like she's getting through to Sirius, which she is.

"Your right, but when and what do I do?" Sirius says dumbfounded.

"Ehhhh… We'll come up with something." Lily says little dumbfounded herself. "Come on, we'll figure this out in the common room."


	5. Chapter 5

**I do not own any of these characters!**

On A Whim 

"That's it? That's your plan?" Sirius says disappointed. Sirius and Lily are in the Gryffindor common room discussing the way to go about telling Sirius' love his true feelings.

"Yep, that's pretty much it." Lily replies as if she just told him the meaning of life.

"So, all I have to do is go up to him and tell him?!" Sirius says let down. "I thought the plan would be a little more… easier."

"Easier? Is it so hard to go up to him and say 'I love you'?" Lily asks irritated. "Sirius, the bottom line is you have to tell him. Get him alone and tell him."

"I don't know… Couldn't we… find a different way?" Sirius asks while fidgeting.

"Sirius." Lily put her head in her hands. "There is no other way." Lily looks up into Sirius' eyes. "You either take a chance and tell him or just try and forget about him." Lily looks down at the floor and then gets up and walks to leave. "If you want I could come with you, but that is all I can do." Lily then walks up and into the girls' dormitory.

Sirius is left alone to think of his plan and how he'd get the boy on his own to tell him the one thing that scared the shit out of him.

Meanwhile in the library, James and Remus are conversing about talking to Sirius. They both agree that Remus should talk to Sirius, but they are not quite sure on how to proceed. They can't decide if Remus should be forceful and demanding or if he should be gentle and patient. Sirius lately has been isolated from them. There is no telling if he's still their friend. So they talk for about an hour more before deciding upon the silent and patient approach.

"Ok, so do you know the plan?" James asks Remus for the fourth time that hour.

"Like I said the last three times you asked me, YES!" Remus said aggravated. "I will get Sirius alone and calmly ask him about everything that is going on. And I will promise to remember to ask him about Lily and him. Ok? Satisfied?"

"Yes, now right after dinner we will put this plan into motion." James gets up from his chair in the library and heads for the door. "Are you coming?"

Remus looks up at James. "Yea, just thinking of what to say to him." Remus gets up and exits the library. Together the two walk to the Great Hall for a well deserved dinner.

Alone Sirius sits in the common room. It is dinnertime and Sirius has decided to skip out on dinner because of nerves. He looks around the common room thinking of things to say to the boy. Every sentence, every word he comes up with just doesn't feel right. Sirius stares into the fireplace, watching the flames lick the top of the hearth. He feels the heat swallow him like a cloud of smoke into a dream.

There sits the boy beautifully silent and still. He looks at Sirius with a smile filled with warmth and love. Sirius smiles at the boy loving every bit of him. Wait… how did he get in here without me seeing him? Oh well, who cares. It doesn't matter he's here with me, I have him all to myself. For the first time all day Sirius feels confident that the boy loves him back. "Sirius." He hears his voice. But it's so far away. Wait… Am I asleep? No, no I can't be. "Sirius." There it is again. His beautiful voice calling my name. But… wait… "Sirius."

"Sirius." Sirius looks up into the eyes of the boy. The one boy, who all year has been filling Sirius' dreams with love and hope. Who also has been making Sirius fall in love with him everyday and without realizing it. Every time he sees this boy he gets weak in the knees; every time Sirius saw him his breath got caught in his chest and only when he was out of sight could he breathe normally again. This boy with his light brown hair and brown eyes and soothing voice. This boy who made him want to be smart and to try his hardest. Who…

"Sirius. Are you listening to me?" The boy waves his hand in front of Sirius' face get his attention.

"Sorry. I just spaced out for a second, but I'm back." Sirius says looking into his brown eyes. Before the boy can continue Sirius stops him by putting his finger to the boy's lips.

"Please, be quiet for a minute. I need… I need to tell you something." Sirius says while his face turns a bright red and his breathing becomes somewhat shallow. "From the first time I met you I knew you'd be different than anyone I've ever known. You were smart and nice and you became my friend without judging me on my past. For the past year I have been writing poems and writing songs and even dreaming about you. I'm not saying that I'm some crazy psycho person. What I'm trying to say is… What I'm trying to say is…" Sirius looks at the boy and his calm expression and does the one thing that he'd never, ever dreamt that he'd do.

Sirius walks up to the boy and presses his lips into the boys'. They kiss for what feels like eternity till Sirius pulls away. "I love you, Remus."


	6. Chapter 6

**I do not own any of these characters!**

Lost and Broken

Alone Sirius sits on the floor of the common room with knees pulled close to his chest crying and breathing abnormally. It's been almost an hour since Sirius felt the lips of Remus on his own but to Sirius it felt like a lifetime. At that moment it seemed to Sirius that everything was unimportant and pointless; grades were futile, eating insignificant, nothing mattered. Nothing. Sirius felt completely lost and broken, almost as if he were an empty shell. Sirius had finally given up. Sirius recollects, without really meaning to, the causes of his grieve.

_Flashback to right after Sirius kisses Remus. Present Sirius disappears and past Sirius and Remus appear._

"_I love you, Remus." Sirius says looking into Remus' brown eyes. Their eyes are locked until Remus looks away with an expression of great confusion and… was it disgust? Sirius couldn't tell. All of a sudden, Sirius is filled with fear and his heart starts to beat uncontrollably. He thought he knew what was coming, but he was wrong._

"_How dare you kiss me!" Remus says with a hint of anger in his voice. "What gives you the right to just… to just kiss me and then tell me you love me?" Sirius was having a hard time believing what he was hearing. "I can't believe you kissed me. I can't believe you kissed… me!" Remus says with a little chuckle._

_Sirius tries to move toward him but Remus backs away. Sirius looks at Remus with an expression of complete helplessness. Remus just shakes his head and backs away even more. Sirius gives walking toward Remus one more try and this time Remus moves away and says the one thing that destroys Sirius. _

"_Stay away from me." Remus says this without looking at Sirius. He can tell by the way he says this that it is hurting him almost as much has it's killing Sirius. With those words said Remus turns around and walks out of the common room. _

_Flashback ends. Sirius and the common room fade into few._

As ten minutes pass by Sirius' cries become quieter and the sound of returning students becomes louder. He hears this and quickly gets up and runs up the stairs to the dormitory where he jumps into bed and covers himself with his blanket, just as students burst through the common room passageway.

Sirius listens while students talk about exams, the opposite sex, and the end-of-the-school-year-feast. He listens for the sound of those soft and familiar footsteps climbing the stairs to this dormitory. He waits. And soon enough, Sirius hears them slowly making their way to the top of the stairs, where they stop at the entrance. And some part of him wants to believe that Remus is looking over at him, worrying and caring about him, but just thinking about it brought tears to Sirius' eyes.

Sirius waits for the sound of Remus retreating to his bed, but the sound never comes. Instead he hears Remus turning around and heading back down to the common room. Sirius quickly pulls the blankets off of his tear stricken face just in time to see the back of Remus' worn out and patched robes disappearing down the stairwell.

"Remus, wait!" Sirius jumps out of bed and runs to the doorway where he sees Remus stop at the bottom of the stairs and turn to look up at him. "Please stay." Sirius says with pleading eyes. Remus looks up into Sirius' teary-eyed face before turning away and walking out of the common room.

Down in the common room, Lily and James watch as Remus storms out of the common room. James looks away from the portrait, which Remus just exited, and into the eyes of Lily. She looks knowingly up at the dormitories and then looks back at James, signaling him to come over. James jumps out of his seat and rushes over to Lily at the back of the common room.

"You know something, don't you?" James asks Lily with a forceful voice as he takes a seat next to her.

"Yes." Lily says defeated. "You see… It's like this…"

"You don't have to explain." James says with a sneer. "I know. You are going out with Sirius, aren't you? It is because of you that he hasn't been acting himself lately."

Lily looks at James and tries to keep in her laughter, but fails. Lily bursts out laughing. "You've got to be kidding me. That's what you think?!?! That Sirius and I are dating? Wow, do you have it all wrong. We're not dating." James gives a sigh of relieve. "Nor have we ever." Lily lets out a giggle and says in a whisper. "Sirius is gay."

James stares at Lily in disbelief. "Your joking right?" Lily shakes her head. "But I don't get it. Then why has he been acting all…" Before he even finishes his sentence he knew. "It's Remus, isn't it?" Lily looks up into his eyes and nods her head yes.

"Sirius loves him." Lily says looking away from James and up at the boys' dormitory. "And by the looks of things, Remus doesn't love him back."

"We have to do something. Maybe… Maybe we can get them together. You know… to talk things over." James says with excitement. "You can go talk to Sirius and I'll go talk to Remus. Then we can…" James stops and looks around; deep in thought. "We can bring them to an empty classroom. Of course we don't tell them the other will be there and once we got both of them in the classroom we lock them in and tell them they can't come out until they talk things over." James ends his speech with a smile.

"I like it! When shall we put this plan into action?" Lily asks with gleam in her eyes.


	7. Chapter 7

**I do not own any of these characters!**

Rock. Paper. Scissors. Shoot.

"Best Two out of three." Two first years outside of the Gryffindor common room decide, by the means of Rock-Paper-Scissors-Shoot, on who will try and jinx Ms. Norris. "Rock. Paper. Scissors… Hey, watch it." James comes running out of the common room and collides with the two first years.

"Sorry." James says a little distracted. "But have you seen a boy about my height with light brown hair, wearing shabby robes come by here?"

"Yea, I think he headed that way." The shorter of the two points down the staircase.

"Thanks." James turns his back on the two boys and runs down the stairs. Once down the stairs James takes a left down a vacant corridor. He walks up and down the corridor looking in every empty classroom and finds nothing. And then it hits him. James reaches into his pocket and pulls out The Marauders Map.

James takes out his wand out and places the tip to the middle of the blank parchment. "I solemnly swear that I am up to no good." Just as the last word leaves his mouth, the once blank parchment starts to fills up with lines, dots, and names. James looks closely down at the names looking for Remus' dot and finds it in the prefect's bathroom on the 4th floor. "Mischief managed." James stuffs the map back into his pocket and sets off down to the fourth floor.

Meanwhile back in the boys' dormitory…

"Sirius?" Lily knocks on the boys' dormitory before slowly opening the door and having a look around. "Sirius? It's Lily. I want to talk with you." Lily walks over to Sirius' trunk and looks down at Sirius sitting on the floor with his back against his bed. Lily walks over on to Sirius' right and takes a seat on the floor next to him. "I'm guessing your talk with Remus didn't go as planned."

Sirius looks over at Lily with an expression of great despair. "I kissed him. I didn't know how to explain how I felt so I showed him. After I kissed him I told him I loved him. He just looked at me with disgust. He said 'How dare you kiss me' and that I had no right. And then he walked away." Sirius looks down at the object in his hands before chucking it across the room. "Who am I kidding? I'm nothing compared to Remus. He's brilliant and smart; I'd just ruin his life. He deserves someone better. Someone who can have an intelligent conversation with him and who reads all the same books as him."

Sirius looks around the room, avoiding Lily's eyes, before bursting into tears once more. "Sirius, don't cry." Lily lightly rubs her palm against his back to calm to him down. "And don't think that way. You are intelligent and Remus would have to be crazy not to fall for you."

"He seemed pretty sane to me." Sirius says getting up from his perch beside his bed. Lily watches has he walks over toward Remus' bed. There Sirius stands looking down at Remus' neat bed thinking to himself. _How could I have been so blind? Remus would never love someone like me. I'm a worthless piece of dragon dung and he's… perfect. _Tears start to fill Sirius' eyes once more, but they don't fall. _I should have never told him how I felt. I've ruined everything. I should have just tried to forget about him like I planned instead of listening to Lily. I'm pathetic. I need to get away. I need to run…_

"Sirius!" Down the stairs Sirius runs with Lily following closely behind. "Sirius, wait!" Sirius reaches the portrait before Lily and bolts through it. Lily follows suit, but when she steps out of the common room there's no Sirius to be found. Lily looks in every direction, but sees no one. "Sirius!"

Four floors down, a great shabby dog runs down into the Entrance Hall and out the front doors.

"Pine Fresh." James pushes open the door to the prefect's bathroom and walks in to find Remus sitting on one of the cushiony couches blindly staring at the water in the pool sized tub. "I've been looking for you." Remus jumps at the sound of James voice.

"How did you'd find me?" Remus asks somewhat distracted.

James pulls out the Marauders Map. "How do you think?" James gives Remus a little smile. "Come on." James moves aside for Remus to walk out the door.

"Where are we going?" Remus asks as he stands up and walks over to James.

"We're going to have a little talk." James motions Remus to go first. Remus walks out the door then James follows. "Lets find a place where we can have a little privacy." James leads the way. They walk down two flights of stairs and then down two corridors. James walks up to the first classroom on the 2nd floor and pushes open the door. "Ladies first." James gives a smile, which Remus doesn't return.

"What is it that you wanted to talk to me about?" Remus asks after he takes a seat on one of the desks.

"Sirius." James watches Remus for a reaction, but all he receives is a blank stare. "We all care about one another, I know this and you know this, but something tells me that Sirius more than cares for you." James watches has Remus looks away. "He loves you, but you already knew this, didn't you."

"No. It wasn't until…" Remus looks at James for a brief second before turning away blushing. "This afternoon when he kissed me and told me how he felt."

"And…" James says trying to get more information.

"I… I told him that he had no right to kiss me. I didn't mean to say it so harsh, but I was so shocked and scared." Remus looks over at James with tears in his eyes. "I wish I could take it back. Sirius is one of my best friends and I would never want to hurt him. It's just… We can't be together."

"But why?" James asks a little confused.

"Because." Remus was speechless; he couldn't explain why. "Because… it would ruin our friendship. Something would go wrong and then we won't be able to go back to the way things were."

"I think I get where you're coming from, but Remus you can't let that stop you from being happy." James says walking over to Remus and looking him in the face. "I understand that you are scared of what this relationship will bring, but if you truly and deeply love Sirius you should give it a chance. See where the current will take you. For all you know Sirius and you could be made for each other." James leans over and whispers in Remus' ear. "And in my opinion, you two were made for each other." James looks back into Remus' smiling face.

"You know you just might be right." Remus says a little shocked. "You know James, you are smarter than you look." Remus' smile grows even more at his joke.

"Ha ha very funny." James says right before an out of breath Lily comes running through the door looking extremely worried.

"Lily what is it?" James and Remus ask at the same time.

"Sirius…" Lily says panting. "Ran… Away"

"What?" James and Remus say in unison.


End file.
